Monday, July 26, 2010

the life before

When I think of you
I fall into various stages of panic,
never knowing how I felt then but uncertain
or maybe just ephemeral,
plotted on a course for loss or love—

But a very different time, that year,
insane with desire and ambition,
addicted to all things an inch
beyond my reach;
love beyond love,
light beyond light,
some life more full and complete
than life would allow;
twenty years in
on loveless abject poverty,
the life before shrugs
and recovery—

The time is barely mine anymore,
either forgotten, or understood,
and I risk being dreamless
at the expense of pleasant company.

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